it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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