Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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