the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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