dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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