The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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