yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
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