I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
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What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
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He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
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