i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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