im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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