do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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