I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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