chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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