Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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