We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
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