he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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