dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize