I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I got her a Nickelback box set.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
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