Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
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