I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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