Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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