Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize