i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I can't put those talents on a resume
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize