there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Randomize