What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I love you. Go after that dick
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
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