she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
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