Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
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Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
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