U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize