if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize