No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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