Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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