Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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