I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
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