I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
handjob tips. give me some.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
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