she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
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Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
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What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize