i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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