That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize