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i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Randomize
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