eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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