chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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