I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
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