Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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