I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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