I need help removing her.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
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Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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