You're so nebulous sometimes
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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