I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
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