Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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