Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
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will barter weed for kareoke machine...
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
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Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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