fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
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