glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize