I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize